my orchid. lil power flower monsters.

blurg, this is just an experiment.

an idea.

how's come people from other countries come to America to work and send money over to their families but we don't do the same? send your worthless kids to China and make CK clothing and send their money back to us. it'll teach them the value of a dollar. yeah, and we can sit tight and buy big screen TVs and watch porn all the time cuz our kids are in China or where ever. Sounds right to me. it's time to stop spoiling these brats. better yet, lets make our own sweat shops here in America. American made toys and clothing by American brats. so what if they don't get an education? do you really think they'd have a future here with no jobs anyways? and, actually, who's to say they can't learn while they work? better yet- they work and learn and if they answer wrong they get beaten within an inch of their lives! yes! make a surely shitty pay check but at least they can pay for their own education and food. that gives the adults more $$$ for the important things. so we can buy more of the shit those lil brats make and stimulate the economy! woo! yeah! America's future will grow up smart and have strong work ethics! and not just a lil jaded.
i think jaded people make better Americans. all these pansy ass liberals are so worthless. being mean gives you a sense of righteousness and hell, as long as you're delivering then no one can say you're not righteous! if everyone was like Miranda Priestly then Amercia would be a much better place. that woman has zero tolerance for bullshit. and Patty Hewes. zero bullshit people with work driven lives. i mean, their personal lives might be a bit rocky but right now America needs more workers and less lovers. love produces nothing except babies and murder. and neither babies nor murder need help. niggers produce those for government checks. babies i mean, not murder. or maybe those ghetto moneys murder for government checks and go to the no ID required places and cash 'em...
when i say niggers i don't mean all black people, just ghetto acting people of all colors and etc, so simmer down sensitive people like Capital N.
my bf is a lazy nigger today for sleeping past 11 am. and as soon as he wakes up he wants to play with his penis, like a nigger. 
anyways, i need a cup of coffee and a cigarette.
cheers.

you all suck as parents from this age group.

in this day of age / day in age / whatever. single parents- delusions on both parties.
children raised by mothers are usually weak, manipulative extroverts.
children raised by fathers are introverted, self serving, and generally trouble.
mothers forget their kids are their kids.
fathers forget about their kids.
sooner or later god will cut you down.

it seems both parties are willing to fight against each other. it seems neither are willing to work together for the children.
kids see too much on behalf of their parents and television and television is the parents fault.
these days we're all worse as humans. we think we're getting better but i think we're losing the basics.
we're all selfish and no one deserves their kids. kids should fear and love their parents. parent should be like God to their kids. fear of being bad and punishment, striving for God's approval. Parents these days are the devil. we sell our souls to be loved and seen as perfect. our faults used to make us stronger. now we understand and love regardless. there's a point in which your child has become a monster and you need to punish it / install the fear / intolerance. no one is doing anyone favours dealing with these disgusting lil habits.
single woman with kids are the worse. well, sometimes, they're so annoying. they want to be so strong and independent but they come off as whinny cunts. the feminist revolution hasn't gone very far. they're so easy to seek support and they cry and cry and cry the whole time about how it's so hard. my mother didn't do any of this. she had grace. women these days have forgotten what it is to have grace. they want to be as strong as men but don't wanna do the work as a man. "money is power" was probably coined by a woman.
single men with kids... i think they forget their priorities. it's usually pussy before kids. but hey, at least most of them don't complain about it.

kids with kids are the worse. they're not done partying so their kids take a back seat to that shittt. they're all stupid and don't make shit or worse don't work. and the government loves them, the liberal government i mean, cuz they're all future voters for life. having kids at a young age fucks your life up and you're probably never going to recover if you take the easy way. kids these days with kids are all single or will be after the next frat party. the generation of young people suck in general. and blame the parts of that one. anyways, these smarty pants college kids are all so full of shit. they act like growing up in American was so hard, so they're all crying for a big liberal change. more freedom they cry as they vote for big government. and none of them can get a government job cuz they can't pass a drug test. or the ones that can vote Republican.
that's such a bias statement, hahahaha.
lets just say i don't see a pretty future. but i believe something will happen. lets just hope and pray the influences of the younger generations stay behaved. the Mileys, Salenas, Tylors and Jonases, as annoying as they are, at least they have a message i can get on board with.
because God knows the parents aren't.

the weak voice of the Minority

because I'm a homosexual- my voters registration card doesn't say Nikolas anymore. it says GAY. it tells me how to vote. it, in fact, lines up my whole life, so crystal clear. because I'm GAY I'm no longer an Individual, even worse, I'm a Minority. and cuz I'm GAY i support all minorities and I'm entitled.
because I'm a Minority I'm Democrat and I'm lazy. i see all my fears coming true and all my dreams crushed. because I'm a Minority I've lost my voice but i can plan ridiculous anti-gay rallies in Target and harass people that have nothing to do with nothing. because I'm a Minority I'm loud. i listen to popular music and know all the fashion trends. because I'm GAY I'm AIDS infested and a child molester. at least that's what the Right says i am. to the Left, to the Left - sing it Beyonce!
my life is a musical or pain and untrust for society. they hate us but praise us on TV shows. we have Hollywood by the balls and they make us look so cool and polished, fake plastic. and yes, we all vote Democrat or, worse, Independent. I'm full of news i read on a blog and support whatever Lady Gaga, Britney, and Madonna support, you know, cuz they're the way. the wave of the future.

I'm a Minority and listen to everyone else and i wonder why I'm stuck in place and haven't grown.

those that just wanna dance

why, if they're just supposed to chew, do teeth have nerves? seems like the body's greatest mistake. seems like they should be like rocks. but i guess teeth need to be alive to be stronger? no, that doesn't sound right.


i quit, i guess, those that just wanna dance... seems like such a senseless waste of time, to just dance, dance, dance. i think people that just wanna dance have a lot of air in their heads. fuck, waste.


do you think it'd be OK if my teeth danced to Lady Gaga's song "Teeth"? or to Nine Inch Nails "With Teeth"? would that make my teeth wasteful niggers? niggers dance. in cages of stupidity.


i don't mean that like they don't mean that. run and tell that. 
i used to be useless.
i used to dance.
i used to drink.
do i hate on dancers kuz i can't dance no more kuz i can't drink no more?


no one should ever take me seriously. seriously, it's the silly ones you have to watch out for. kuz you never know when they'll start break dancing like chickens. those marks they make in the sand look like Chinese writing. written by break dancing chickens, molted, one legged, corporate mutated chickens. the ones in cages pumped up on drugs that we feeds ourselves and our children.
those sad, break dancing chickens.
i forgive those chickens for dancing. i hope they dance to good music, though. or i don't give a fuck about those disease chickens. nasty, nasty chickens.


Yoko Ono eats chickens and it's kinda weird if you really think about it...
does Yoko Ono dance?

speechlessness.

it's sad when you think about how i'm so good at saying what i don't like. when capital N rightfully thinks you're a racist and you're not good at explaining things. maybe i'm just a really unhappy person. maybe i like the drama of my burns both on the giving and receiving end. i could make accuses. but those are as pointless as, well, hell, i dunno. i'd like to dedicate this note on a positive note but the point that i haven't gotten to that point yet is that i'm not good at accentuating the good.
capital blurg.
but i hope i don't make as much sense on whatever it is i'm trying to talk about.
the good ol' gemini contradictive me. useless to the point of...
and maybe i'm not doing any good, maybe my hopes for this blog are just wasted water. think green Nikolas. green in envy for people with hearts heavy with hope.
how did i grow up so mean?
is this what i want?
kinda, when i think about it. grumpy old man at the age of 26. laughable? is this irony? no, i think not. but laughable, sure.
as i continue with my regularly posted blogs, as i'm sure i'll forget this, my wishes are just for a better future. either tomorrow or the next hour or the next week or the next minute to the coming years. i hope there will come a day when i'm happy to point of speechlessness.

anyways...

we've become so bored with our lives, i think. i've met people that are in love with life and they all have one thing in common. they're all Jesus freaks.
anyways, as i was saying, we're all bored with our lives. seems to me boredom and drug use come hand in hand. but it goes further than that. boredom also creates obsessions and art. creating art is like a drug. there's sex which is like a drug. and the earlier noted Jesus. all drugs. some legal. all a high. all an addiction. food is a drug...
i'm not pro drug and i don't really know where i'm going with this thought... i guess i'm trying to define a drug to myself. i guess i'm trying to make the point that no one is without vices. does it make me feel any better? do i have a drug problem? feel better no, and drug problem- depends on what definition you go by.
you know, i keep getting headaches and it hurts when i try to concentrate on one little thing. like when i'm whittling wood- i get into a trance and then notice my eyes hurt and i have a headache. i have a headache today from a vicodine hangover. see, i took two vicodines yesterday because we where going to the bar and everyone would be drinking and i'm a recovering alcoholic so i don't drink but i didn't want to be sober with a bunch of drunk/drinking people... didn't know you could get a vicodine hangover... my head is aching now as i'm looking at the screen and typing this.... maybe i have a brain tumor. that'd be redundant. anyways...

best foot forward, my intentions.

as i drink my sparkeling white grape juice i think and plan ahead for how the new year, 2011, is going to be good and productive. pay some bills, go back to school, get some pretty shit, and home improvements... exciting. so, raise your glass, kiddies, and here's to hoping.